Choose Your Membership Level


3MD” Membership Levels – make your choice below:

Pirate Level • NUX MadMax Level • IVAR THE BONER Viking Level • CALIGULA Roman Level

Please pick your “3MD” membership level below.
You have to pick at least the free PIRATE LEVEL plan to have any kind of access.
Scroll down all the way to make your choice.


Pure Existence” 

The Pirate level is free.

It is basically the entrance level to having a Scaffies account, and do some very basic things.

You get for free:

Everyone will initially be at the ‘Pirate’ level – and you can choose to upgrade (and later downgrade again, if you like) to any of the other levels.

P.S.: if you sign up for NUX below, you get to see the Pirate Report from which the icon picture comes (up-front bonus: if you click on the Pirate icon, you can see the entire picture of what happens to the balls of captured pirates at sea).

If you are a member who is a student, low-rank soldier (E-3 and below), low-pension senior, with no/low income, from a low-GDP country, please use the NUX “Special Considerations” plan below. Optionally, you can include a one-time-only donation on top of the monthly $5. Only use this if you are eligible for it – we have to trust your honesty. If you live in a country affected by financial sanctions thus without access to western-world credit cards, please contact the volunteer admins for a different solution – we do not want to lose you over sanctions!

If you do not want to join any “3MD” membership plan, and  just wish to delete your Scaffies account, please contact the volunteer admins: – we could not figure out how to grant you access to the “delete” function, without giving you access to the entire member section. You had ample lead time prior to the change effective January 8th, 2020 – we gladly assist you in doing it now. Please send your request from the Scaffies registered account email, so we know it is you. Same goes if you need to catch up on previously sent messages etc, and do not wish to subscribe to any memberships. We’ll give you a few free days on the NUX plan for it (‘NUX’ Trial Membership).


NUX” is the main membership type
for 90% of all previous Scaffies members.

With this $5 per month plan, nothing changes for you from what you had previously from 2013 to 2019 (except for contributing a Starbucks-coffee-worth each month to the site).

‘NUX’ [“nuts”?]  is also the model we discussed at length for months, took two votes on since November 15th (and before) – even do so still: now. About NUX & NUX quotes.


You have access to all of what Pirates get, plus:

Monthly, 6 Months, or 1 Year recurring donation memberships.
Unsure if you want to join the NUX membership? Ask us for a 2-week trial:


The following membership types are only for those, who want to support Scaffies more – this is entirely optional. They are for the 10% of the members, who have supported Scaffies in the last six years at some level, and those who may wish to join this team of generous supporters. In return there a few select extras, and the pride badges which go with the commitment:

We have to define the levels somehow to make it work with the membership system, thus the various pricing options to accommodate all the various pledges.


The Viking level is basically what the special benefits were for all those 221 donors, who supported Scaffies financially in the first six years, and kept it going.

It has the same capabilites as ‘Nux’,

Monthly, 6 Months, or 1 Year recurring memberships.



The Roman level Power Member is a new role & level.

A few members want to go above and beyond just donating substantial cash to the community.

They want to engage on a much more intense level. You cannot express more how much you are into ballbusting than with a CALIGULA membership :)


  • add status and generosity to the ‘Ivar The Boner’ level
  • plus access to special features which we will also be implementing (“Caligula’s Balls Orgy” and more)
  • plus all capacities of the IVAR level
  • early “word” and access to new ‘stuff’ on Scaffies
  • plus exclusive access to the CALIGULA group
  • plus exclusive access to the Paying Membership Directory

Monthly, 6 Months, or 1 Year recurring memberships.


Existing Members: please choose your level – you have to pick at least the free PIRATE LEVEL plan to have any kind of access.

New Members (from JAN 2020): dont’t just pay and create an account – we want to make sure you know all the rules first, and to make sure you like it all, before you subscribe to a donation membership plan! You do not need to pay up front, not knowing what you get into … please go to the Registration page.  :wink:

CAPTURED PIRATE - $10 per Year - recurring with OneTimeOnly Donation option + fees PIRATE 1 Year recurring until cancelled = $12.50 Select
NUX - MadMax Level - $5 per month - Yearly + fees NUX 1 Year recurring until cancelled = $63.25 Select
NUX - MadMax Level - $7.50 per month - 6 Months + fees NUX 6 Months recurring until cancelled = $47.50 Select
NUX - MadMax Level - $10 month-to-month - recurring + fees NUX 1 Month recurring until cancelled = $11.25 Select
NUX - MadMax Level - $5 month-to-month "Special Considerations" (students, E1-E3 soldiers, low-income seniors, unemployed) - recurring with OneTimeOnly Donation option + fees NUX "Special Considerations" - 1 Month recurring = $5.85 Select
IVAR THE BONER - Viking Level - $25 per month - Yearly + fees IVAR 1 Year recurring until cancelled = $305.25 Select
IVAR THE BONER - Viking Level - $35 per month - 6 months + fees IVAR 6 Months recurring until cancelled = $213.25 Select
IVAR THE BONER - Viking Level - $50 month-to-month + fees IVAR 1 Month recurring until cancelled = $52.75 Select
CALIGULA - Roman Level - $50 per month - Yearly + fees CALIGULA 1 Year recurring until cancelled = $605 Select
CALIGULA - Roman Level - $75 per month - 6 months + fees CALIGULA 6 Months recurring until cancelled = $453.85 Select
CALIGULA - Roman Level - $100 month-to-month + fees CALIGULA 1 Month recurring until cancelled = $103.80 Select

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You can pay with all major credit cards.

Stripe provides the embedded credit card field, which shows up here on the site. Scaffies does not (!) see the information you enter. You are only asked for the card information (which we also do not see! – of course) – no other personal info. The system handles the automatic credit to your membership level – we see nothing more than that. This is perfectly safe, millions of people use the service every day – Stripe is a major vendor in the arena. The membership service system used here is provided by PaidMembership Pro, which is used by over 80,000 other sites. It only asks you for the card information – and that works! This is the default, and it works automatically.

The memberships themselves only show up as “3MD (short for: Mandatory Monthly Member Donations) – we figured not everyone wants “Scaffies” to appear anywhere.

This works all fully automatic, so the volunteer admins do net get involved at all, except for customer service in case there are questions.


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P.S.: one member interested in a yearly Caligula membership asked how safe Stripe is. Here is my answer:

… completely understand your concerns. There are many bad people out there. It is also always a hassle when cards change. But despite the fraud issues, the world runs on credit cards, and over 99% work just fine without issues. PayPal unfortunately is really difficult – for vendors, but also for customers (they declined your end of the transaction, not ours – for whatever reason: they will not even say).
We are just a small membership site, and just as with Eventbrite (donation ticket sales for the first 40 SCAFFCONs), we rely on large multi-national companies with the means to protect their customers to collect their dues. 
Eventbrite was funded in 2006, is a public company on NYSE since 2018, and has global revenues of over $300 million yearly. With its IPO, it was valued at close to $2 billion.
Stripe was founded in 2010 and is currently valued at $35 billion (they received a total funding amount of $1 billion).
Stripe is ranked 3,249 among websites globally based on its 13,236,899 monthly web visitors.
From those numbers you see Stripe is a much (!) bigger company – and this should lend to a higher amount of trustworthyness as well?
On top, Eventbrite is in the ticketing market, and Stripe’s business is to move money – so they should be much better at it than even Eventbrite is at collecting funds for events.
In both cases, we just embed their code, as millions of other sites do it. The WordPress software we use to process it, is also the #1 on that market (the most-used product with over 80,000 active installs). I think it can be reasonably assumed paying Scaffies memberships via Stripe is as safe as it can get. Either way, we depend on Stripe to survive.

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